Sent to Bed Happy
by Loveedith
Summary: Bertie thinking things over after Edith has accepted his proposal - or so he thinks. Continues at the breakfast table the following morning and goes on from there. Slightly AU.
1. I Love You, Bertie

Bertie had asked Edith to send him to bed happy. Now she had done just that.

...

He didn't know why she had kept him waiting for an answer. She was like a jig-saw puzzle, or a riddle he couldn't solve. Sometimes he thought he had the solution, and then all the pieces got mixed up again.

But now, at last, she had agreed to become his wife. And he was so happy.

...

"I love you Bertie", she had said. "I really do love you."

How he had waited for those words. She had told him she thought he had a lot to offer, she had told him that she was thrilled and delighted by his proposal but she had never before said that she loved him.

He had told her that _he_ loved _her_ hundreds of times, but he never got the expected answer to that. She said _that's sweet_ or _you are a darling_ or... or even _you are too kind_ , which was neither here nor there and decidedly not very romantic.

He hadn't dared to ask her either - _Do you love me?_ He had been too afraid of the answer.

But now she had said it, and after that he had been so happy that he hadn't really listened to what else she had to say.

...

There had been two reason he could think of for her wanting to think over his proposal.

One was of course that she didn't love him. He knew she felt comfortable with him, but perhaps that was all. She liked kissing him, nice and automatic as she called it, but she had really never said that she loved him. She couldn't love him the way he loved her of course, that was simply not possible, but he had hoped she at least loved him enough to consider a life with him. She had even said she would like to have children with him, so why not?

The other reason was that she hadn't been sure that she would be able to live with him in a simple estate agent's cottage. He couldn't blame her really, she was used to something much grander, but he himself didn't really mind where they lived as long as he could be together with her.

Well, he was ashamed to admit it, but that problem had been solved by Peter's death. Now he could even offer her something much grander than Downton Abbey.

He wished it could have happened in some other way, but this was what had happened. Through his grieving for Peter he had felt a growing hope that she would now say yes to him.

And tonight she had!

...

Just when he was about to fall asleep, Bertie started thinking of what else she had said. _My life is not so simple. I'm afraid of living in a fool's paradise and dragging you into it with me._

Was that what she had said? What could she have meant by that?

He thought about it for a while, and decided to ask her later on. But he was sure it wasn't anything important enough to make him postpone his announcment of their engagement tomorrow at breakfast.

Then he fell asleep happy.

...

The next morning he would have the pieces of his puzzle mixed up again. But fortunately for him he didn't know that.

So, at least this evening, he was sent to bed happy.

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AN:Thank you for reading! Please leave a comment!

...

One more chapter, I think. The famous breakfast.


	2. I Admire You, Bertie

"I admire you Bertie", Lady Mary said with a malicious smile the next morning at the breakfast table. "Not everyone would accept Edith's past."

"Mary, don't", Tom gasped.

Bertie looked at Edith. She seemed devastated. What was it that Mary was about to say? Probably what Edith had hinted at earlier, whatever it was that had made her feel unworthy of his love.

He had thought that had been because Mr. Gregson had been her lover. Why else would Gregson have let her inherit him? But Bertie and Edith had never spoken about that, so he wasn't certain about it.

It didn't bother him anyhow.

Whatever it was Mary was talking about, Bertie wanted to hear it from Edith, not from Mary. And in private.

Bertie realised that he had to think fast now. Edith had been right about her sister, right now she was up to nothing good.

Whatever Mary says, act like you already know, Bertie told himself. But the best thing was if she didn't say anything more.

...

"Thank you, but there is nothing to admire", Bertie said, looking back at Mary. "We all have our pasts, don't we."

Bertie looked at Mary with a friendly smile, as if he was willing to overlook whatever was in _her_ past.

Mary hadn't expected this. She had expected him to ask what she meant by Edith's past, but he didn't seem one bit interested or bothered. Perhaps there was something else than stupidity behind Bertie's politeness and friendliness.

There was no use telling him about Marigold now, Mary thought. He probably knew already and it would only make Mary seem stupid.

After all, Bertie had promised Edith to bring Marigold with her, Edith had gushed about that in her irritating way a couple of weeks ago.

...

"The past is not the important thing for a marriage", Bertie added. "The important things for a marriage are the present and the future."

He gave Edith a big smile. She smiled back but it was obvious that something was still worrying her.

"I'm the happiest man on earth because your sister has agreed to become my wife", Bertie added, looking straight at Mary, daring her to say anything derogatory about Edith.

"Congratulations!" Tom said. "I'm certain that you will be very happy together!"

"Thank you Tom!" Bertie said. "I know we will."

Mary just stared at Bertie so he gave her another friendly smile.

Then he got up from the table.

"Will you excuse me", he said. "I have to go up and start packing."

Then he left them, feeling rather certain that Edith would follow him in a little while and explain what this was all about.

...

The three that were left in the room looked at each other.

"My past!" Edith said with a snort. "Really! Don't think that I will ever forgive you!"

And with that she also left the room.

Mary was still quiet. Bertie had made her lose all ability to speak. She didn't like to have him as her enemy. He was dangerous. He was not a bit charmed by her and impossible for her to manipulate. She knew nothing of men like him.

Bertie was so definitely fighting in Edith's corner and Mary had to get used to that.

She looked at Tom, but he irritated her as well. Because Tom looked distinctly relieved.

* * *

AN: Thank you for reading! Thank you for the lovely reviews! Please tell me what you think about this!

...

I hope I managed to surprise you! I'm a little tired of writing pure canon.

...

There will be at least one more chapter.


	3. I Need to Talk to You, Bertie

Bertie was folding his clothes when Edith knocked at his door a little later.

"Come in, Edith", he said. "I hoped you would come."

"I need to talk to you, Bertie", Edith said. "And I can find a servant to help you pack", she added.

"Never mind that! I packed it all myself at home to begin with, I'm not used to being waited on. I have lived alone in the estate agent's cottage since I moved to Brancaster. I've done my own cooking and washing up, not to mention packing a suitcase or two."

Edith looked at him, she already knew this, of course. She knew he could cook and was impressed by it, men seldom could. Tom could, of course, he had eaten most of his meals at the garage. But her father definitely couldn't.

Bertie had learned to cook in the army and later by reading cookery books. He quite enjoyed cooking, she knew. He had cooked for her once or twice in her flat in London, bringing things with him from Brancaster, products he was proud of and wanted her to taste.

"Mother is talking about moving to Brancaster now, which you might not like", Bertie added. "But I haven't lived with her since I went to Sandhurst. She is still living in the cottage in the village where I grew up, cooking for herself. If she moves in she can have her own flat to live in, and her meals sent up from the kitchen. It will save her some money, and she can be the hostess when I have to entertain until you and I marry."

"Oh!" Edith didn't know what else to say about this. She really didn't like the thought of Bertie's formidable mother in the house, however big Brancaster was. She was afraid of her, even though she hadn't even met her yet.

"I have a cleaning woman from the estate, who comes once a week. And I leave my washings and mending at the estate. Benefits that go with the work, that and a lot of foodstuff, as you know. But that's all the help I get. I try to save where I can to be able to do things I enjoy."

"Oh!" Edith said again, feeling suddenly guilty about all the expensive dinners she had let him pay. But still, she knew he would have been insulted if she had offered to split the bill or pay it all.

It was strange, she earned much more from the magazine, even without doing any work there, than he did as an estate agent. But still he was supposed to pay for everything. That would of course have changed if they were married while he remained an agent, then they would have used their incomes together for the good of their family.

"I have told you how much I earn, I thought that was why you hesitated to marry me", he added. "Anyway, I can pack this myself. Besides, I think you and I ought to talk."

"Yes, I think so too", Edith said.

He looked at her and smiled encouragingly. It was obvious that he thought she should do the talking, at least to begin with.

"Thank you for what you said to Mary at breakfast", Edith started. "About the past and the future. There are not many men who can make Mary shut up when she has decided to say something nasty."

Bertie just looked at her, he looked a little embarrassed, so Edith continued.

"I don't know exactly what she was going to tell you, but there is one thing I need to tell you that I would rather tell you myself, in private. Especially since you may want to break up with me when you hear it."

"I don't think anything would make me want to break up with you", Bertie said earnestly.

"You don't know me. You can't know that", Edith looked down, afraid to meet his eyes.

They were both quiet for a while.

"Your past, yes. What are the terrible things that you have done? I hope you haven't killed anybody?" Bertie asked with a smile.

"No, of course not", Edith said with a short laugh.

Then, after a moment's thought, she added: "In fact it is quite the other way around."

Edith looked at Bertie now, it was obvious he was wondering what that could mean. Then she saw that he suddenly realised.

"Marigold!" Bertie said. "It is Marigold, isn't it? Marigold is your daughter."

* * *

AN: Thank you for reading! Thank you for the nice reviews to last chapter!


	4. I Adore You, Bertie

When Bertie told Edith that he understood that Marigold was her daughter, Edith only nodded.

"That is wonderful! No wonder you wanted to bring her", Bertie said with a big smile.

Edith nodded again, surprised by his enthusiasm.

"Yours and Mr Gregson's?" he asked then and Edith nodded a third time.

"Or yours and mine if you would let me", Bertie added, looking at her rather shyly.

"Yes, I would love that", Edith said with a smile.

They were both silent for a moment.

"Oh, how daft I have been", Bertie said then, shaking his head. "Of course she is your child!"

"Have you been daft? I don't think so. You have only met her a couple of times. And she doesn't look very much like me."

"Well, I'm so relieved! That explains it all!" Bertie said with a delighted sigh.

Edith had expected many different reactions from Bertie but this happy relief certainly wasn't one of them.

"Explains what?"

"Why you didn't give me an answer. And why you wanted to move a child who had the chance to grow up on a big estate to a land agents cottage."

"Ah", Edith said. So that was why he had wondered why she wanted to bring the 'ward'.

"I thought you didn't give me an answer because you didn't love me enough, and that was painful. Or perhaps that you thought I was too poor, which I could understand. But still, that was painful in another way."

"It wasn't that at all!" Edith said with emphasis. "I love you very much! I've loved you ever since you helped me with the magazine, I think, perhaps already at Brancaster. And I could live with you in a shoebox! I would have accepted you immediately if I had only dared to tell you about Marigold. Besides, I think everything about Marigold would have been easier if you were still a land agent. And I wish I had had a chance to meet Peter."

He looked at her, and it was obvious that she meant what she said. He gave her another relieved smile.

"This is simply wonderful!" he said then.

"I'm so glad that you think so!" Edith smiled back at him, quite a bit relieved herself. "I adore you, Bertie."

"But you should have trusted me", he added. "Things would have been easier for both of us if you had told me about Marigold when I proposed to you."

"Yes, I know that now. But I thought you would be angry about it", Edith said. "Call me damaged goods or whatever."

Bertie looked at her, rather taken aback.

"I would never call a human being something like that", he said earnestly. "Perhaps my mother would, but she is from another generation. Or another planet."

"I have heard my mother call ... someone that too. But not me, that happened a long time ago. Before the war."

Bertie was silent for some time.

"Do you know how many young men I saw die during the war?" he asked her then.

Edith looked at him, he was very serious now. She shook her head slighly, prompting him to go on.

"Well, I don't know either. Young, healthy men in the morning, dead bodies in the evening. Or with horrible injuries, losing a leg or an arm, sometimes both. I never got a single scratch, but after living through that, I think everybody ought to enjoy life while they can. You never know if there will be a tomorrow."

Edith nodded. This was so true. Sybil, Matthew, Michael - and most of the young men she had danced with in her youth - all dead and gone before their time.

"So why should I begrudge you some love?" Bertie said. "Especially when someone as lovely as Marigold resulted from it."

They were both silent again.

"I think it is marvellous that you have Marigold living with you", Bertie added. "Most girls in your situation would have given her up for adoption."

"I tried to give her away, but I couldn't live without her", Edith said simply. "I breastfed her, you see, for almost half a year...Well, I'd better tell you the whole story..."

And so she did, not even leaving out the most painful details like the doctor in London. Bertie listened in silence and marvelled at what a courageous woman she was.

And how much she loved her child.

* * *

AN: Thank you for reading! Thank you for the nice comments to last chapter!

Your reviews are what keep me writing.


	5. I Am Thankful That I Met You, Bertie

"Was this what you thought might make me break up with you?" Bertie asked with a hint of disbelief when Edith had told him the whole story about Marigold. "Or is there something else?"

"No, this was it", Edith said. "My aunt and my granny said i should send Marigold away because I would never be able to marry if I didn't give her up. They said that no man would ever be able to accept her. So I thought..."

"I think that was very bad advice", Bertie said earnestly, looking straight into Edith's eyes. "What if you had done that and we had married and you hadn't told me about her? That would really have been a big lie in our marriage. Every year on her birthday you would be sad and I wouldn't know why."

"I would be sad every day of the year, not only on her birthday", Edith said simply. "And I'm so glad that they were wrong. I'm thankful that I met you, Bertie."

...

Downton Abbey had been a rehabilitation centre for wounded officers during the war. If Bertie had been wounded he would perhaps have come to Downton during that period. She could have met him and fallen in love with him much earlier. Many of the bad things in her life would never have happened.

But she couldn't wish her life away, every step in it had made her stronger. And perhaps Bertie wouldn't have loved her the way she was then. In many ways she had become a different woman since then.

And, even more important than that, she couldn't wish for Bertie to have been wounded. It was such a blessing that he had been spared during the whole war. Edith liked to think that it was because he was such a good man, but - like most nice things that happen in life - it was much more likely that it was sheer luck.

That was what Bertie himself thought, she knew. Sometimes good people get killed, bad people survive. And sometimes it is the other way around.

She thought about all the young men Bertie had told her he had seen killed during the war and suddenly she felt ashamed of herself. Why couldn't she stop bickering with Mary when life is so short and often so hard? Why make life harder than it needed to be?

...

Bertie wondered what Edith was thinking about, she suddenly looked so sombre. He closed his suitcase and went up to Edith and put his arms around her and kissed her.

"What are you thinking about?" he asked then.

"Mary", Edith said. Which was true but only partly, she felt that she couldn't really say that she had been thinking about what could have happened if he had been wounded in the war.

"Try to forgive your sister", Bertie said softly. "She is only jealous. Because very few men would look at her twice when you are around."

Edith looked at Bertie in astonishment. Was he making fun of her?

But he looked serious enough. He really believed that.

Bertie was really the only man that she knew for sure had preferred her to Mary.

Patrick - well - no question there.

And Athony hadn't taken any interest in Edith until he was absolutely sure that Mary wasn't interested in him. Mary had proved to Edith clearly enough that Anthony preferred Mary. And even after Mary had turned down Anthony's invitations Edith had to ask him herself for a spin in his car, and he had obviously only said yes to be polite.

Perhaps she was unfair to Michael, when thinking like that, though. But she could never know about him. He had only met Mary a couple of times and by then he had already been involved with Edith for quite some time. If he had met Mary earlier, he would perhaps also have preferred her.

As a wife that is, but probably not as a writer.

But Bertie had met Edith and Mary for the first time on the same day, and he hadn't given Mary a second glance. That was good to know. She was perhaps not the kind of girl men are mad about, but at least she was the kind of girl Bertie was mad about.

He was a remarkable man and her life with him was going to be perfectly wonderful, she was more and more certain of that.

...

"I'm glad we got this sorted out", Bertie said a little later after some more kissing and cuddling.

"Yes, so am I."

"Shall we go down and tell your parents now? Do you think your mother will be up?" he asked then.

"Yes, I think she will be. Let's go down now!"

"Do they all know about Marigold? Can I talk about her as your daughter?"

"Yes, they do. Perhaps not Mary, but that doesn't matter. Not any longer."

Bertie took Edith's hand in his and they went down the stairs together. Hand in hand, very happy and a little bit nervous.

Just the way they were going to walk down those stairs on their wedding day a couple of months later. Except by then everything was settled and they were a married couple on their way to their honey moon.

* * *

AN: Thank you for reading! Thank you for the lovely reviews!


	6. I Will Miss You, Bertie

They were all sitting in the drawing-room when Edith and Bertie came down the stairs. Robert, Cora, Rosamund, Mary and Tom.

Bertie was still holding Edith's hand. He smiled at all of them in turn, greeting the two older women, whom he hadn't already met at the breakfast table, with a friendly good morning.

Then he turned directly to Cora as he made his announcement.

"As Mary and Tom have probably already told you, Edith has agreed to become my wife. So, I'm afraid I'm not only going to take your daughter away from you, but also your granddaughter, little Marigold."

Cora gave him a big smile, happy that this matter had obviously been cleared out to the satisfaction of all.

Bertie looked around the room again, looking for a second or two at each one of them. He got a smile from everyone, although Mary's smile seemed a little strained.

"I hope you will all feel that you are welcome to visit the three of us at Brancaster whenever you like after we are married", he added then.

...

After a lot of congratulations and the Earl calling Bertie "My dear chap", Edith and Bertie went upstairs again. Edith had decided to accompany Bertie to London and get a couple of days' work done at the magazine, so she quickly packed a bag. After that they both went to the nursery to say goodbye to Marigold.

Bertie looked at Marigold with different eyes now that he knew she was Edith's daughter. He still thought he had been daft not to understand that earlier. Perhaps she didn't look all that much like Edith, they had very different colours, but of course he could see the resemblance now that he knew it all.

That shy smile Marigold gave him when he told her that he hoped to see her again soon was exactly the same as the smiles Edith used to give him when she felt embarrassed about something. Like the time he had told her that she inspired him.

...

A little later they left for the station together in one of Downton's cars. Tom promised to pick it up later at the station.

And thanks to Bertie's fast thinking Mary was spared two of the worst dressing-downs of her entire life. Not that she knew about it or would have felt one bit thankful about it if she had known.

She wasn't all that interested in Edith, she only resented that Edith would have a higher rank than herself.

...

Bertie and Edith said goodbye to each other at the station in London before he took the bus to the airport. They had already agreed that Bertie would pass by Downton on his way back to Brancaster, to bring Edith with him to Peter's memorial service. A week after that they would have a dinner at Brancaster to announce their engagement.

"I will miss you, Bertie!" Edith said when he was ready to embark the bus.

"I will miss you too, but we will soon meet again", Bertie said, smiling at her.

After that he kissed her, and that was the sweetest kiss she had ever had. He knew her now, her whole story, her shameful secret, and he still loved her and adored her.

Bertie was not only perfect for her. He was perfect, period. A perfect man.

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AN: Thank you for reading! Thank you for the kind reviews to last chapter! Please tell me what you think!


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